Ah, Christmas. It’s that special time of year when families come together to celebrate peace on earth and good will toward men. It’s also incredibly hectic and stressful.
Think about it. There’s a ton of shopping to do and the malls are always overcrowded, your crazy Aunt Kathleen and her beloved pet ferret are staying with you for two weeks, there are still stockings and tinsel that need to be hung and the cat won’t stay out of the Christmas tree.
It’s no wonder why the dang sugarplums aren’t dancing in mom’s head.
Sometimes mom might need a little help getting it all done. And for Helen Cox, a mom of two from Scotland, that meant turning to the Internet to get her son, Alfie, a costume for his school’s holiday show.
They were putting on a Nativity – the biblical story of Jesus’ birth on Christmas – and Alfie was playing a shepherd.
So she purchased the “Labreeze kids boys brown shepherd costume inflatable sheep nativity fancy dress outfit” on Amazon.
In mom’s defense, the costume looked pretty legit online – though, to be honest, the one Alfie is wearing in news reports looks a lot more DIY than the one mom allegedly purchased – and came with the shepherd’s outfit and an inflatable sheep.
When it arrived, Cox sent her son to school with it – apparently without checking it out.
The school ended up sending the sheep back home with Alfie, who asked his mom if he could play with it. Thinking nothing of it, mom blew it up and then realized that the sheep wasn’t so innocent.
In fact, it came with a bow on the top of its head, red lips, long eyelashes and an, uh … “backdoor pleasure hole.”
Suddenly, Cox put the pieces together and realized that she had sent her 5-year-old son to school with an inflatable sex sheep. (We don’t event want to know why that’s a thing.)
“I don’t know whether to laugh or cry,” Cox told the Daily Mail. “I have no idea if they’ve seen it was a sex toy and that’s why they sent it home. I’m mortified.”
That’s not where Cox’s ordeal ends, either. Alfie took a liking to the sheep and didn’t understand why he couldn’t keep it.
At first, Cox told him that he couldn’t keep the sheep because it didn’t look like a proper sheep and that the hole was “for the sheep’s toilet paper,” but couldn’t think of another reason that he should have to give it up. So now she’s reportedly going to steal it back and blame it on the Elf on the Shelf.
For the record, Amazon did remove the shepherd’s costume that Cox purchased from its website. However, there are still “Smiffy’s Inflatable Bonking Baa Baa Sheep” options for sale as gag gifts.
Which means, parents, be careful when shopping online. Slow down, check and double-check what you’re buying because, as the rules of the internet declare, if it exists, it’s someone’s fetish. And if you’re not careful, someone’s fetish might end up in your manger.
What would you do if you ended up with a blow-up doll as a nativity prop? Would you freak out or laugh it off – and do you think Alfie should be allowed to keep the sheep? Let us know in the comments.
Photo from South West News