Indiana Dad Goes Viral for Hawking ‘Free Ass Whoopins’

A father of five set up a corporal punishment stand in his driveway to dole out paddlings to naughty children. Reviews were mixed, and the backstory is kinda messed up, too.

Whether you’ve spanked your kids or you’d hell-no never spank your kids, one thing’s sure: Using corporal punishment in child discipline is a hot-button issue.

Which brings us to the case of Dwayne A. Stamper Sr. This dad to five kiddos recently cause a social media ruckus with a mock “business” he set up in the driveway of his Indiana home.

In the photo he shared, Stamper is reclining in the sun with his flip-flop clad feet propped on a table that declares, in black marker on cardboard, “Free Ass Whoopins! LLC.” Stamper is apparently ready for young customers, too. He’s got not one but two paddles at the ready – one leaning against the sign and the other slung purposefully over his shoulder.

“Parents, your kids need a whoopin?” Stamper asks in his Facebook post. “Summer can’t end fast enough? Stop by, I’m set up! No kids over 13 … they may whoop me.”

Cue the ovations, outrage and snark. “I know a hero when I see one!” lauds Kenyotta Haire on the post. “Or try talking,” counters Precious Browne. “I think he needs to franchise,” quips La Priel Reed.

Since popping up on July 24, the post, as of this Oh Mother publishing, has enjoyed 8,900 likes, even more comments and north of 180,000 shares.

But context, as usual, is king. And some insight on why Stamper set up “shop” might well revoke any pass he might’ve received here for creativity or humor.

It all started with Stamper witnessing a boy, age 5 or 6, at a local restaurant. “(He) wouldn’t stop crying because he couldn’t have a piece of gum,” Stamper explains in an interview with Yahoo! Lifestyle.

So Stamper, as he tells it, piped up, laughing and asking the kid’s mom, “Would ya like me to take care of it?” After the grandma chimed in that the boy was “spoiled,” Stamper told them, “A good crack on the ass with a belt will fix the problem, trust me!”

Yep. Now we’ve got a crying kid, probably frazzled mom, seemingly huffy grandma and unsolicited parenting advice from a stranger that involves ass cracking.

What exactly got solved here?

It’s no picnic for anyone, parents or bystanders, when a kid has a meltdown. For whatever reason, though, this guy, a 46-year-old operator at GM, took the opportunity to heap on some public shame on a small scale. Then he got “inspired” to craft his makeshift business and spread the word on a larger scale.

There are all sorts of parent discipline types. Stamper, whose kids are reportedly ages 14 to 26, feels “kids should fear their parents a little,” Yahoo! notes, and believes under-age-13 spankings are effective.

Sure, spanking isn’t illegal. Nor is posting a cavalier “Free Ass Whoopins” pic on Facebook. But how this all went down tans my hide a bit.

I guess at least one other notable person might agree: Stamper’s wife.

She “doesn’t agree with (her husband’s) discipline method,” Yahoo! adds, “and takes a gentler approach to conflict resolution.”

That sounds far more kickass to me.

Photo posted by Dwayne A. Stamper on Facebook.

What are your feelings on this dad’s “Free Ass Whoopins LLC” post – and how he handled the crying kid at the restaurant? Let us know in the comments.

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