Vasectomy Cakes and Parties are a Thing for Dads-No-More

Parents are retiring from procreating and ready to celebrate. Vasectomy parties are becoming an offbeat way to take some pain out of the outpatient procedure.

Parents’ parties are getting increasingly weird. From vagina cakes to “man showers,” it seems that everyone wants to have an awkward time together.

So, get ready for the newest trend in uncomfortable events you may not want to RSVP to – the ‘”ball-voyage” party!

Wives across the country want to acknowledge their husbands who are “taking one for the team” by getting vasectomies.

Parents are announcing that there will be no more baby showers, diaper parties, gender reveals or any other new baby celebrations in the future.

And they are making that announcement in very entertaining ways.

Here are six pun-tastic takes on the outpatient procedure, including cakes, cards and, yes, even party games.

Retiring the ‘swim team’

Man stands with children while holding a 'retiring the swim team' cake
Photo via Leah Randall’s Facebook page

Leah Randall went all out planning her husband’s vasectomy party. She had a custom-made cake, ball-themed menu and even printed T-shirts for the whole family – the kids’ read “Swim Team Survivor” with their birth dates.

Is it just us, or does dad look kind of uncomfortable? Hubby may be trying to smile, but look at that stance! Cake and T-shirts may be fun, but does all this social-media publicity really help with the healing?

No more knock-ups

White cake decorated with sperm
Photo via Amber Cole on Pinterest

Some wives didn’t have time for a whole party but still wanted to celebrate their husbands’ sacrifice. Amber Cole, who already has three children, opted to celebrate her retirement from C-sections by baking her husband an egg-shaped cake with mini sperm cupcakes flanking it, bearing the very blunt message: “I’m glad you can’t knock me up!”

Cole told Redbook that she was surprised by the response her homemade dessert received when she posted it to Pinterest, saying, “Normally, I’m the only person who thinks I’m funny.” Well, we’re chuckling at your sperm-cakes over here, Amber.

Putting on the squeeze

White vasectomy cake with lemons
Photo via Signature Desserts Nashville on Instagram

Some bakeries are eating up the new party trend, too. Signature Desserts in Nashville, Tennessee baked up this on-point confection that went viral in March 2019. On Instagram, the bakery captioned its masterpiece this way: “We make cakes to celebrate any occasion!” Judging by their work, it’s clear they mean business.

Snip-snip, Michigan-style

White, blue and green vasectomy cake that says snip snip hooray
Photo via #gracefulcakesmichigan on Instagram

Michigan Instagrammer mexibillystiod got in on the trend, too, with this classic take. Let’s hope this new trend continues bringing some of our local Pure Michigan bakeries some business!

Play balls!

Pin the scalpel on the balls game
Photo via Imgur

If you’re going to have a party, you better have cheesy games. One anonymous couple posted their party to Imgur and its irreverent games look admittedly fun.

From their “pin the scalpel on the vas deferens” take on pin the tail on the donkey, to a spin on The Price Is Right, where guests had to guess the prices of items the couple could afford being child-free, the post has plenty of inspiration for other couples looking to celebrate vasectomies.

Snippy remarks

Card designed for a vasectomy party
Photo via SackaSnack via Etsy.com

Sometimes a card is all you need to express your appreciation for your man’s sacrifice. You can write a letter yourself, or find seedy Etsy companies, like SackaSnack, that create cards for every occasion. If he’s not up for a whole party and sweets aren’t his thing, just express your gratitude through words.

What do you think of vasectomy parties? Would you ever throw one? Let us know in the comments.

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