I remember when my mom attempted to have the sex talk with me. We were driving on the freeway – which made it impossible for me to make a get away – and she told me not to do it. My dad also weighed in at a later time by telling me that “all men just want to get in your pants.” My husband’s parents, on the other hand, avoided the talk altogether.
And it’s not surprising. Talking to your kids about sex can be uncomfortable to many parents. Yet, of course, it’s totally necessary.
So what can parents do? You could follow this British couple’s lead by hiring someone to have the sex talk with your kids – just like they are hoping to do for their 8-year-old daughter and 7-year-old son.
The couple posted to a child care website looking for a part-time nanny to talk to their children about the birds and the bees for £2,500 or about $3,445.05
According to the couple’s post, here are the topics they would like the “ideal candidate” to cover:
- How sex is between two people who are in love (preferably married, but we’re modern enough to know that’s not always possible)
- Consent (with a possible discussion of rape culture)
- Sex with both genders
- Periods (for our son too – we want him to be comfortable with this natural part of life for women)
- STIs – what they are, what they can cause and prevention
- Sexual protection – the pill, condoms, abstinence etc.
- Explanation of male and female anatomy
- Other gender types – transgender, non-binary etc. (this is an area we would really struggle in!)
“All sessions will be at our home at a time when one or both of us can be in the house. We will not be in the room with you, but will be home so the children can come and find us if it’s getting too much for them,” the ad also reads.
In some ways, I applaud these parents for asking for help and wanting to make sure their kids get a proper sex education, which includes learning about consent, understanding anatomy and how to stay safe in the act.
On the other hand, it bothers me that they aren’t comfortable enough to have this talk with their kids. Clearly the couple has had sex before, so they should be able to talk about it. By not being able to discuss a totally normal act, they are sending a message to their children that sex is a bad thing, something shameful that you shouldn’t talk about with those you trust most – let alone do.
What do you think of paying someone to have the sex talk with your kids? Would you do it? Tell us in comments.